10.20.2008

MyndeFug

First off, to my Facebook peeps, thank you. You know who you are.
 
Secondly-things are going pretty well.
This past weekend Dad and I went on our quarterly 'guys only' road trip to Kentucky. There were a few objectives for the trip. Most I knew about, one I didn't until yesterday. The main objective was to hit Durbin, KY and get some homemade apple butter and watch how Sorghum (or SARGUM, if you're older than 50 and from Kentucky or Southern Ohio) is made from cane to syrup (when we went last year, they were just finishing up for the day so we didn't get to see the process). I have pictures and video of that portion of the trip, so I'll be posting those later.
 
We also went out to the family farm. We found out that the guy who bought it wound up selling it.  We also found that the farmhouse burned to the ground (this happened the week I was at RRFC), taking my great aunt's secret stash of cash (of which were sure there were thousands) with it and leaving only the chimney. I have pix of that at home, too. It's sad, but fitting in a way. I'm pretty sure the ancestors are going to make it difficult for anyone but family to really truly enjoy that land.
 
While we were out that way we got some Sugar Stick Candy (my 2nd favorite candy...first depending on the day) from Bob Ferguson's store out in Blaine (B&L in case you're out that way). I have never seen this candy in Ohio. And it's not even in the areas of Kentucky that are close to Ohio (Ashland, Flatwoods, etc.). It's like there's a law somewhere that you can only sell this stuff in little mom+pop general stores.
 
It was a good and weird weekend. My 2nd cousin died while we were down there. My dad was close to him and it kinda hit him hard. It was weird haivng Dad wake me up Sunday morning to tell me and having the feeling of 'I really don't remember who that is.' But he was my dad's age, so I'm sure that's part of what jacked Dad up about it.
 
And then on the way back, I had a heart to heart with Dad. Or rather, I listened. And he told me some things that completely shattered some of my underlying assumptions about my childhood. I think that's going to be a good thing eventually. Right now it's just a LOT to wrap my head around.It's kinda got me jacked up, but I know that when I get through the sorting out of it, it'll be good and I'll be a much better person for it. And I think it helped Dad to tell me things that he's wanted to tell me for 30+ years. I can't imagine how much this stuff was eating him up inside. But like I said, I think it's gonna be good for both of us.
 
So let the healing begin. :-)
 
I RSVP'd as a 'maybe' to the mini-reunion this Friday. I'm gonna go. Touch base with people I haven't seen in 20 years. Not sure how long we'll stay or what, but I think it will be good. I think I need to see that people can change. I'm pretty sure that's the lesson that the Lord has put in my life right now. That my assumptions and premises about people can (and usually are) completely off-base from what those people are actually like. And just because something happened in the past, or a person was a certain way in the past, it doesn't necessarily mean that they stayed that way 20 years later. And to interact (or not) with them based on those assumptions without knowing who the person is TODAY is just not a good thing. I have a hard time of letting go of things that hurt me (or hurt my feelings). And I just got a phenomenal wake-up call this weekend about how that can really be wrong and wind up hurting other people. So I think because of that, I need to go Friday and just re-connect with some of my classmates again. If anything to start over..saying 'look...I may have been an incredible douche 20 years ago...you may have been a tool...but that was then. Here's who I am today. Who are you?'  And that's also the reason I'm gonna wind up going over to Soissons afterward (if it's still going on when I'm ready to leave the Mini Reunion). I figured out my costume for that, too (but need a blond wig). I'm gonna go as Spicoli-thirty years later. Cargo shorts, Vans, Baja, maybe a pizza box for good measure.
 
That idea came from an idea I had in the shower a couple of weeks ago. It was simply this. You know how people say that Elvis had his 'fat Elvis period?' Well, what if other famous people from history had their own 'Fat phase.' This would require some mad photo-shop skillz. But a few I was thinking of ...Fat Hitler....Fat Hendrix...Fat___________ (I really only had Fat Hitler and Fat Hendrix). But I think it could work. It COULD be funny (even in a 'dude, that's so wrong' kind of way).
 
That's all I got for now. It feels weird. It's like things are still the same but some things have changed over the weekend and I know parts of me will never be the same again. And I think that's a good thing.

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