4.15.2014

Self-Censoring

I was about to post the following on FaceBonkers:

"Sometimes I start to post something on here and think to myself "hmm...this could quite likely turn in to one of those things that was much funnier in my head."....so I don't post it.

Oh don't be sad. I still laugh. And those things usually make their way in to the blog or one of the 14 journals floating around my house.

In very rare occurrences, I still post them here. Only later to have my suspicions confirmed. "

What's funny about that is that there is so much noise on that site that it's very rare to actually come across an original thought or idea. The more the site 'evolves' the less in-touch I feel with my 'friends' on there. And that's kind of the sick joke about social media. Everyone says that they get on social media to 're-connect.' And cool. That's fine. But how much 'liking' can you do when this friend you reconnected with only re-posts other shit they 'like'??

If you want to know anything about me, for #$@( 's sake, don't read my FaceBonkers page. You really won't know anything about me before getting ambushed by the sidebar ads.

Come here. Read this blog.

Or better yet...call me. Email me. Text me. Let's get together for a beer and some wings.

To paraphrase and completely bastardize a quote by Plato, "you can learn more about a person in an hour of beers and wings than you can in a year of Facebooking."

I'm not sure where I was going with that. Other than to say, the elation and joy felt this weekend carried through the day at work.

Nothing made me happy today. Today I am happy. I approached everything with joy and laughter (and some sarcasm and some good ole fashioned 'whatthe--'). The day went quickly. I drove home singing.

I got home and filed my taxes.

And still happiness (and a teensie bit of incredulity) was present. Yes, happy filing my taxes. Why? Because for the first time in YEARS, I don't owe. I'm getting a refund. You could say that Uncle Sam is subsidizing my divorce. Woohoo.  That was, in fact, one of those status messages that seemed funnier in my head than it appeared on my Fb wall.

This is pre-bedtime rambling. Something to clear the cob-webs before Dreamland. I hate going in to my writing workshop in Dreamland with the remains of the day still fluttering about. I hope you don't mind.

The goal, of course, is to finally have some forward momentum on that novel...or whatever might spring forth from my brainbucket.

What really surprises me, if I'm being honest, is that others actually read this and find enjoyment and amusement from it.

Don't get me wrong. I LOVE that. I love to make people smile....laugh...or even give me that single raised eyebrow of the 'he just wrote what?!?'-variety. I just can't believe people still come back here. But hey... I'm happy that you do.

By the way...don't get the habanero-mango wings from a certain national pizza chain named after a board game involving individual numbered tile pieces. They aren't very good at all. I took one bite and threw the rest away.

But Todd, you could call and complain and get free food.

You may think that, but I really can't. For 2 reasons. I know the people who run their Consumer Relations division, and I don't want to ruin their day. And secondly...the normal response to something like that is a BOG card (Be Our Guest) or gift certificate. For more of the same food I didn't like the first time around. Nah. That's ok.

In fact, I got PizzaHut the other night and they sent the wrong order. I ordered the Pepperoni P'zone. They sent me the '3 Meat P'Zone.'  I called them up and it went a little like this.

PH: Hello thanks for....blah blah blah...will this be for pick-up or delivery?

ME: Neither. I'm just calling about a previous order I just received.

PH: Yessir. How can I help?

ME: You just sent me the wrong order. I ordered a Pepperoni P'Zone and you sent me a 3-Meat P'Zone.

PH: Oh sir. I'm sorry about that, can we send you a new one out?

ME: No. That's OK. I just wanted you to know in case you mixed up my order with someone else's and they got a pepperoni P'Zone when they wanted a 3-Meat.

PH:um....oh. Well. OK. Thank you sir. Are you sure we can't-

ME: Nope. Just wanted to bring your attention to the error so it doesn't happen again.


I'm pretty sure he was not prepared for that. Having worked for that chain before, I can tell you that the number of calls scamming free food is high. I seldom want free product like that. I just want them to know they messed up so that they can not mess up for the next person (even if that next person is me down the road).

And...since I got an on-call work in the middle of this whole thing, I completely forgot where I was going with this or even if this post actually had a point.  I'm not sure now that it did.

Seems a good time for bed, actually.

G'night all!

-A.T.

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