3.10.2015

Da'Fuq?

I'm sure I've used that title for a blog post before. Or at least one that conveys the same sentiment.
I would have started this about 5 minutes ago, but I couldn't type. That is to say, I can  type, but if my fingernails are any kind of length at all, playing guitar or typing annoys the shit out of me.

That's not why I haven't been writing (although, I might have to use it at some point). When I got some dental work done last year, the days of nail biting ended. It was too easy to pop off a veneer whilst trying to trim my nails via mastication. Problem is, I never really paid attention when I was biting my nails, so there was never really a good sense of 'if I don't chew my nails for a week, will I need to suddenly chow down because they're too long to do anything?' No. It was more along the lines of..my nails are always trimmed...by my teeth mostly, but trimmed nonetheless.

Yes. I know it's gross. And I know that I spent more time going over those couple of paragraphs than if I had just left that bit out and started writing (I'd probably have caught up to myself by now).

It's a mystery that we may never know the answer to.

Speaking of mysteries. I started my laundry last night (no, that's not the mystery). It had been easily 2 weeks since I had done laundry of any sort. No. That's not the mystery either. That is quite easy actually. Each pair of dress slacks can be worn twice if hung immediately upon coming home from work. Jeans can be worn for Casual Friday and throughout most of the weekend.  The key is having enough socks and underwear. The rest is pretty standard. 

But I digress (shocker!)...which, if you're new to the blog, I would like to say first off, welcome. And secondly I almost never digress and dive off in to tangents,..and arcs...and co-sines....OK. That's not true. Geometry aside...I think this blog can best be described as 'stream of (barely) consciousness.'  And that's OK.

Shit newbies...see what ya did there? Got me all distracted with my manners and what not.  Where was I? Oh yes. The mystery.

So...I go down do do laundry and there, on my dryer, next to my bottle of bleach and bottle of cheap ass EXTRA (NOW with OxiClean) is a new, unopened bottle of laundry detergent. It is the same blue color as mine. Also containing Oxi Clean. In fact, the new bottle IS the OxiClean brand. It's the same blue color as mine.

One might think that someone, out doing grocery shopping, would remember the blue bottle....and the oxi clean and jump to that conclusion.

I looked at my neighbors' laundry stations. Neither of them had the same detergent. No, it was clear this bottle belonged at my station.

Only problem is...I don't remember buying it. Nor do I have any friggin' idea where it came from.

I asked both neighbors. Both denied it.

My land lord lady lives in Lithopolis...so...when the snow was particularly shitty..I would shovel the walks. No big deal. Just something that needed done. I suspect that the detergent might be the same sort of anonymous gift.

Either that, or someone is using my washer and dryer. But I don't think that is the case. If so, I suspect that my utilities would show increased water usage and they don't. So...again. Weird.

It sounds like a mystery for those clever canine lovers at Mystery, Inc.  Or even Encyclopedia Brown.

Or perhaps not. After all I don't think it was Old Man Withers the Amusement Park caretaker.

At least not this time.

-A.T.

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