Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from December, 2013

Well, F**k a Duck

I'm not going to lie. I'm kind of annoyed that this post is even coming out of my brain...but dude. Seriously?? The Duck Dynasty dude is an idiot. But take a step back for a minute and chill the fuck out.

I'm sick of people blowing up the Facebook and Twitter feeds about First Amendment bullshit.

I don't recall reading about Mr. Duck getting arrested for what he said.  And I'm sick of  what  he said getting bandied about--it continues to propagate the hate. And that's just what he wanted.

Take a step back.

For one second look at the situation not the comments.

Let's change the script.

*******

OK. I've had time to sleep on this. I actually fell asleep last night while writing this and thus decided it was time to go to bed.

Here's the thing. There are some key points that bug the fuck out of me with this whole Duck Dynasty bullshit.

1. His First Amendment Rights were never violated. He was never arrested. The authorities never came to his house and de…

Yes, But Did You Have Fun?

It's human nature, I suppose, when mentioning that you traveled to a distant city to be asked 'That sounds neat--Did you have fun?.'

Especially when that city is some place like New York City (or in my case, Queens--which is close enough).

And I chuckle to myself when I hear this, because I know the person asking doesn't really mean anything malicious by it. And I also know that with very few exceptions, they don't really know what I mean when I say we 'cabled the new store.'

So I smile and say 'It was nice.'

But the truth is...in the 4 trips I've been here, I've only had one day 'off' where we weren't on the job site. So...I haven't really seen the city more than that one day. I haven't explored the ins and outs or local flavor of Queens at all, with the exception of the restaurants that are in walking distance to the hotel and the (friggin' amazing) Italian joint next door to the job site (Valentino's. On Kisse…

Holiday Funk

I seriously don't know what the deal is.

I just feel kinda...'meh.'

Oh don't get me wrong...I have some pockets of joy and bliss. And those are increasing. But it's the rest of the time where the focus and 'joy' seem to kind of just get put on the sidelines.

Once I get in to the actual activity (writing...photography...editing), it's fine. I find the bliss. But I'm finding that getting to the point and actually making myself sit down and do those things that bring me joy is where I'm struggling.

I dunno.

It's just a weird time of year for me, I suppose.

I doubt I'll reference this one on Facebook.  So if you happen to stumble across my moment of doubt, you get the easter egg.


No Time for Humbug

I really was on the fence about the whole Christmas Tree thing. And then one of my friends said something about liking to turn out the lights and just watch the tree.

And I got to thinking....'ya know....I like to do that too.' The scene in Christmas Story where they turn off the lights and just watch the tree kinda gets me every time.

So. Yeah. I stopped on the way home and got a 3ft, pre-lit artificial tree. And now it's set up.

As the snow was falling...the Fireplace was on Netflix....lights off...tree lit.

It felt very calm. Peaceful even.

And for nice little chunk of time tonight I forgot all of the other shit that's been swimming 'round my brain.

This would be one of those nights when I would walk to Brew'Stirs. I'd know it was going to be a dead night. I'd get to hang with my friends behind the bar. And the few tortured souls who braved the elements for a pint. And then when I'd gotten piss blind drunk, I'd stumble home and fall in to be…

Why Bars Are Better Than Facebook

So...I'm reaching the point in the year where I'm getting fed up with the bullshit on Facebook.  When I find myself saying 'Lighten the fuck up people, it's only Facebook' more often than I say, 'wow...that's cool,' then I know it's time to dial my exposure down a bit. I don't think I need to walk away cold turkey like before, but I'm gonna be slowing my roll a bit.

As I was in the shower today I thought of two funny 'eCards.' One was just the phrase "Alcohol. The original Social Media." The other was a picture I took a while  back of shots all lined up on a bar and I would caption it "The original Friend Request."

Rather then re-hash all of my "Facebook is the Anti-social Devil" bullshit today I thought I'd switch gears (oh, don't worry, I will re-visit the irony of calling Facebook a 'social' network again in the future, but not just yet).

So...all the lines of the whole Bars: The Origi…

I'm Not A Policeman

OK...so I posted over on Facebook land this clip:

And I said in my status message that I had no idea why I posted it.

I lied.

I know exactly why I  posted it. It's the look on the kid's face.There's all this chaos going on around her...and she stands her ground once. And almost stands it a second time until she succumbs to the norm and follows the pack.  But even then, there's this kind of quiet resignation about the way she says 'Alright...'

And I guess that's how I feel.

It makes sense that my friends and family tell me that I'm better off on the path that I'm traveling. I get that. I really do. I mean, I understand why you all say it.

But it doesn't fucking help. I know you think it does, but think it through for a second.

I had a person in my life that was my best friend...that I was planning on spending the rest of my life with. And then...that person slipped away (I'm sure I slipped away from her, too, if I was ever that person to her)…

Bombs in the Bassbins

I need to take a week or two vacation. I need to head down to the farm. With my laptop...a decent set of cans, and the reference monitors.  Maybe a guitar and a mic. And I need to write (fiction/songs/poems) and I need to record.

I just need to see what comes out when it's just me. With no distractions for literally miles.

I'm not sure when this can happen. Perhaps next summer. Not sure. It may not happen until I get my own house built on the 1 acre my papaw left me.

In any event I know we're close. We're close to shit bubbling over the surface.  I know there are songs and works I that I need to write. I know they are just below...ready to break that thin film of dew that sits on the water at daybreak.

And yet, part of me wonders how much of that is the new normal.

It's still quite fucked up in my head...I'm not going to lie. It's not so bad that I would consider medication, because let me tell you...there was NO good that came from me being on Anti-Depress…

Catalysts

It's weird, yeah? I'm sitting here....alone in my apartment.
I'm not going to lie. There were times in my marriage (well...both of them, actually), when I thought that I'd fucked up by getting married. With my first marriage, it wasn't so much the case because I've got an amazing daughter and there's not a single fucking thing in this world I would trade for that.
What's weird to me though, is that there were times when I would see this sort of 'alternate reality' version of Todd. There were a couple I was rather fond of. 
One was the scraggly haired philosophy professor that was walking across the quad at OSU on the way to his next class. Tweed sport coat with elbow patches. Well loved by students and fellow faculty alike. "Crazy" was used in a positive context when I was talked about.
Another was the author. I'd be sitting at the coffeehouse with my Apple laptop (it was a Powerbook in early visions of this reality), working on my…

To Tree or Not to Tree

So...first Christmas alone in...well...ever. Even after the first divorce I had my daughter living with me,  so there was another person in the house. The decision to put up Christmas decorations was an easy one. She was a small child...I wanted to share the joy of the season with her. No brainer.

After this dissolution, though, I'm alone. Don't worry...I'm not lonely...well...not all the time. But there's just me here now.  My daughter is 19 and doesn't live at home anymore.  Christmas eve is always spent at my parents house. And I don't see any presents being opened here on Christmas day (unless of course I decide to get myself something and wrap it all up...but that would be weird).

I have a wreath on the door. That's pretty much for everyone else. Oh sure..I see it when I come and go, but it's mostly out of sight.

I guess my thinking is...I don't want to really be reminded of all the Christmasy things this year...and least not when it's just…