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Showing posts from July, 2014

A Day In The Life

there is a whisper thin thread of ethereal nothingness that separates this plane from the others. this gossamer of 'reality' separates all the planes. And yet, as humans....we cling so tightly to this realm as the "real world." The truth is...they are ALL real worlds.  And on the OTHER worlds, WE know this.

It is only here we have forgotten.

This is why we dream.

To remember.



If I were going to start my manual of truth and light, it would start something like the above passage.  But I'm not going all commune on you just yet.  The above passage is really more to give you some background in to how I think about things. And will make the true intro to this passage make a little more sense (at least that's the hope).

---*---

When I fall asleep in this world, and wake up in what I call the 'dream world', I usually do so willingly. I don't always allow myself to remember when I fall asleep in that world and wake back up in this one but I do know I have a p…

My Sincerest Thanks

I grew up writing. And reading.

There were authors I loved to read. I would devour their books any chance I could. The Incarnations of Immortality series was one of my absolute favorite series (And I just found out there was an 8th book in 2007--WTH?!?).

I knew from reading these books that there was one thing I loved more than reading.

Writing.

It makes me giddy. No...seriously...I smile so wide it hurts my face to think that there are people out there--you--who come here daily..weekly..monthly...whateverly...to see if I've written anything new.

I have said that I don't really write for you (And that's partly true. Mostly I write because when I don't, I feel that my soul is dying. Seems melodramatic, but I know the truth of that statement with my entire being). But...you, dear reader, are the piece of the puzzle that is unlike any other. You see...I write because I have to. That is true. However....what makes my dream of being a writer in the grand sense is the fact t…

Blockage

Without reading too much in to anything, I think I've got a bit of blockage. The thoughts are there...floating in my head. Banging to be free. But for some reason when I sit down to write them, they stall.  Or some other shiny object flits in the corner of my periphery and draws my attention (and intention) elsewhere.

It's not the job. The job is going very well. And though there is a fair bit of mental fatigue by the time I come through the door for the evening, I don't think it's that. I could write at lunch (lord knows it was m.o. for months (years?)). So, I don't think it's work.

I'm pretty sure it's not finances. Most of the bills are caught up and the truly pressing ones should be OK once I call them to set up some kind of payment plan or something like that (probably ought to do that tomorrow). I'm not stressed about it. Things work out the way they need to and I know that these little annoyances are no exception. So...pretty sure that's …

Douchiness and Solitude

There was a big post here about how I might actually be an asshole.

But, this isn't the place for it. So...it's going in the paper journal. y'all can read up on it when I'm taking the dirt nap.

It occurred to me after having penned most of it, that sometimes I need to write things to get them off my chest and out of my head, but that those words can have very different meaning to someone receiving them. And to be honest, there are times when the words aren't really for anyone but Future Todd.

I sometimes forget that you guys can't really see the depth and reason of what I say when I say it and that some of the words have the influence of this world on them and not the intent that is in my head as they are leaving my mouth...or keyboard as it were.

In any event, I'm sorry.

Sometimes I don't do so good around people.  Probably a piece of the 'two divorce' puzzle, eh?

I'm off to write.

Peace out,
-A.T.

P.S. For what it's worth, I know now t…

Choice and Intent and +16XP

I'm home. Not at work. Not on my lunch break. I just finished a tasty dinner that wasn't delivered and remembered that I actually like to cook. This is pretty much my go to. Frozen veggies....chicken...stir fry it with a crap ton of various spices and let it simmer on low while the rice finishes in the cooker. Then when it's all ready, stir it all together and voilĂ ! It's pretty tasty. And when you pair it with something delicious and refreshing such as ..it's a damn fine dinner. But back to the working on the blog. Why the big deal about being at home? Simple. Because I'm typing on the Sharkk keyboard case for the iPad mini. By choice.My laptop is 12 feet from me, but I'm at the kitchen table. Using the Sharkk. By Choice.I reached a conclusion the other day. Even if I got the ClamCase Pro, I'd still have to hold down a shift key to get to the '?'. Kind of a wake up actually. On every keyboard, the ? is a second level key. So that shouldn&#…

Lick The Spoon

I'm at lunch eating my greek yogurt and I'm taken back to childhood.Remember as a kid when you would eat a pudding cup (usually Hunt's)? No matter what kind of spoon you used, you had to usually reach in with your finger to get those last bits of precious pudding.At what point in our 'growth' do we become afraid of reaching for what we truly want because we worry about what others will think? Good question. So, in an act of defiance, and embracing my childhood, I reached in and got the last bit of yogurt with my finger. And you know what? It was the tasiest bit of yogurt in the cup.Hmmm. I may be on to something.Speaking of awesome, I got this cool gift from friends of mine this weekend. Yes. It is every bit as cool as it seems. Yes I will share.I'm typing another blog entry on this keyboard-case thingie and have reached a conclusion. While it is annoying to have to hit the Fn key before the apostrophe, it's not $150 worth of annoying, if I'm being c…

The Weekend of The Todd

Found out something interesting today. My neighbors call me "The Todd." At first I figured it was just one of them (Justin has done so openly to my face for quite some time--whatevs). But today, as I looked on my front step to yet the 3rd Sunday paper in as many weeks, I could not have known that I would learn how wide spread it was. Yes. I am aware the sentence is awkard, but it does make sense-grammatically speaking.Backing up, though.Friday night I wound up going out and meeting a few friends for drinks. Apparently they have not received the memo that BrewStirs is no longer my spot. Hasn't been for nigh a year, at the least. Perhaps they'll figure out on the nights I tell them no, no? Mayhaps. Friday was not that night, however.Saturday morning was a planned trip to the zoo with a friend. It was a blast, and I think we both needed to laugh stupidly and in the same day weep openly for the lowering of the least common denominator in the gene pool. I took some pi…

Cold and Clammy

So...I looked. The Snugg case with keyboard also does the bullshit of having the question mark and apostrophe accessed via function keys. I don't get it.Wth?It's not that it's impossible to live with, it's just that it makes me a little more concientious about my typing and that slows down any natural rhythm I might otherwise build up whilst typing. Annoying.There is a keyboard case that does have the keys in the right place. It's the Clam Case Pro.There are a couple of downsides:It costs $150It doesn't allow for portrait mode on the iPad while typing (it looks like a mini MacBook)I would wind up looking like a miniClone of my boss (who has one for his iPad2)It costs $150 and I've already dropped $40 on this, so that would make it nearly $200At the end of the day, I have to really just ask myself if those two keys are really work the extra money. True, the keys are spaced a little better, but again, is it worth it? I'm not going to be typing novels on…

Everything Counts in Small Amounts

So...the pic above should give you a little bit of an idea of what I'm grappling with by getting the new keyboard-case. The keyboard that I was toting around with me was basically a full size keyboard. It could pair to 3 different devices and it is solar powered. But..and this is the huge downside....it is separate from the iPad. Granted, I type a hell of a lot quicker on a keyboard that size, but the fact that it's another piece of gear always slightly annoyed me (anything I may have said aside).So...other than the size of the keys, this Sharkk is pretty much the bomb. I may or may not go in to more detail at some point, but for now, the size is my biggets gripe. And I'm willing to bet I can overcome that. Theres one more thing. And its a nit-picky thing at this point, but it may be enough to drive me to the Snugg keyboard case--it's the damn apostrophes. The apostrophe is not a top level key. It's a Fn+ combination key. May not seem like that big of a deal, but…

New Keyboard

When I do things like write on my blog, the touchscreen keyboard is a bit cumbersome, to say the least. I had been using a Logitech solar powered blue tooth keyboard (which to be fair is still pretty awesome). The only downside is that when I want to take it some where, its 2 items. Which is kind of annoying.). I know that since the iPad mini has a smaller footprint, any all-in-1 is going to be at the cost of a smaller keyboard.I got the Sharkk iPad mini keyboard case. Jury is still out as to whether or not the smaller keyboard is going to drive me nuts or not.I'll probably have more to say on it later, but for now I'm off to band practice after 5 hours at the zoo.Got some more great instant pix.Alright..I'm out. Peace-A.T.(Better here than floating around my head...Thanks Blogsy)

Hungry Like the Wolf

So..driving to work yesterday I had Pandora streaming on my phone (thank you T-Mobile). Duran Duran came on (as it does often on the '80's Alternative' station). And a line struck me in a funny way.

"I straddle the line of discord and rhyme. A howl and a whine I'm after you"

And the part that got me was...the straddling the line. Discord and Rhyme. That's pretty much like my life right now. I know the people who love me never want to hear it, but there are times when I think myself quite mad. Not in an angry way. More like a British way. That is to say crazy. And not the go nutso and kill a bajillion people crazy. But more the 'something in my head is off-tilt. And it makes me think that the way I see the world and everything in it isn't quite the way 'normal' people see it.'

So there's that.  I totally get you Mr. LeBon.

And then as that stuff was rattling through my brain bucket, I noticed traffic slowing for no reason in a spot …

PsychoJournaling

I started this rant in a paper journal--yes, I still keep them...scattered throughout my house. I have a notebook or paper and some kind of writing implement in every room (yes, even the bathroom--where do you think some of my best ideas come from?!?).

As I sat journaling at lunch yesterday, I looked back on the page and thought--wow--that doesn't look like a psycho-killer's journal at ALL (insert sarcasm font here).

See what I mean?

It's got that slightly off-kilter printing that you always see in the movies. Yes...I glue things in my journal, quasi-scrapbook style.  In fact, the entry that this page is turned to is how Hollywood has vilified the simple act of recording ones thoughts in a non-digital medium. In other words, people see you as either a psycho, oddly artistic, or forlorn romantic if you dare take time to put pen to paper.

To which I reply, f*** off, Hollywood.

Just needed to get that off my chest. I've got some things to go write in my journal as I'm…

An Interesting Development

I didn't discover until after I had started my new job at MicroCenter, over 2 years ago, that my boss had a Masters Degree in Photography. And has taught photography to undergrads at OSU as part of his Master's program.

Needless to say, I was pretty stoked by this. I wouldn't be until nearly 2 years later that I got to see any of his work.

It was really good. I could definitely tell the difference with what was shot on film vs. what I had shot on digital and printed on film.   And we've had several discussions about photography's current state.  Not many, but enough that have stuck with me.

So, it was with no small sense of accomplishment that I managed to keep from gushing this afternoon as he was looking through my fireworks photos from the weekend.

"Wow. These are actually some of the better fireworks shots I've seen."

Now, granted, these were already printed shots, not on my computer. There was no post production work done on these shots.

And I ag…

Independence -n- Sh*t

Store High In Transit.
SHIT.

When manure was shipped as cargo in sea vessels, it was often designated with the warning 'S.H.I.T.' Ship High In Transit. Because, if the manure got wet, it would stink.

And thus we get the word 'shit.' So...it's not a bad word. You can pretty much make anything vulgar depending on your delivery.

Along with that little nugget of knowledge courtesy of Papa Skaggs, it was a pretty great weekend.

Friday I went to the Westerville parade (took a crap ton of pix with my instant camera--come over some time and check them out)...got a little sunburned. I have to admit that while I had a great vantage point (and didn't have to worry about parking), I was a little disappointed with the parade. When did small town America parades become political ads? Marching bands..fun floats...some kind of local celebrity (where was Cabot Rea??)  and some kind of military fly over.  THAT'S what I remember about parades. More local and civic groups and …

Human After All

Funny thing happened as I was living my life yesterday--my old life came crashing in.

I fucking hate it when that happens, but turns out this was a good thing.

I was talking to a friend and she uttered the phrase that I wish people would stop uttering (because, truthfully I don't care--but I'll get to that).

"I saw N-- the other day." As though they know this is a bombshell they've just dropped. Why do people do that?

There is only one reply-"Oh? Yeah?"

Story goes that my friend was at a party for someone who also happens to be friends with my ex. I vaguely recognized some of the names since our friends were barely a topic of discussion while we were married.

I guess conversation came around to the divorce (again...why is it anyone's busines?). My friend said 'yeah, the whole thing was really tough on my friend Todd.' And I guess the mutual friend, without missing a beat said something along the lines of "well, it was pretty hard on N--…